my hate-filter is broken.

my world is so full of people who love the gays (or, at the very least, like us), that i sometimes forget that people also use the term as an insult. when i cyberstalk old high school friends and attempt to learn about them via their publicly posted communication, and i read something that refers to gayness—i get all excited and think that i've found a fellow queer. then i realize that they hate us. that they hate me. (even when—actually, especially when—it's veiled in "loving the sinner" or apathetic disregard).

in my more compassionate moments, i sardonically lament their conscripted lives.